Trust
by Shiverpass
Summary: Drabble promised for the missing scene from the last chapter of How To Save a Life. M for language and sexual content.


**A/N:** So, I'm pretty darn happy that some of you people said that you couldn't wait for this drabble. Took me a while, but I think I got it perfect. So, enjoy.

* * *

"_We collide, __s__ynchronized,  
__a__s I gaze into your eyes.  
Feel our souls lose control,  
__w__hen your body softly glides,  
__o__ver mine, __p__etrified.  
But our hearts feel it's the time.  
Won't hold back, __a__t least I'll try,  
'__t__il you end with me,  
__a__nd show me __b__eautiful.  
I'll show you wonderful,  
__a__s we share the love.  
I'll show you everything,  
__t__hat you've ever dreamed of."_

_- Broken Iris_

* * *

"_I want you."_

For a moment, I was paralyzed by shock. He wanted me. He _wanted_ me. Like _that_. And to know that someone, even _Carson_, wanted me like that, I didn't know whether to be filled with Glee or...what.

"I want you too," I murmured. My breath had become heavy as something unfamiliar fluttered deep within me down south.

I know what was happening...it happened to me before, many times. He was making me..._God_, I wanted him to kiss me now.

We both said nothing as he reached forward and unzipped my hoodie...slowly, teasingly, slipping it off and leaving me in my tank top. I had kicked my sneakers off earlier, but I was thankful that I did now.

My breath had hitched and I began shaking when he leaned in and kissed me hard, pinning me to the door behind me. A whimper escaped from me as I felt the door at my back. I felt all of him against me. Especially the hard-on against my thigh. I don't believe my face had ever been as red like that before.

"You have no idea how I've been fighting to hold back," he whispered hotly in my ear.

I whimpered again.

And then I felt him leave me, grabbing my wrists rather roughly and urging me onto his bed. I crawled on all fours (I thought it'd be easier that way) when I felt him get on behind me. He grabbed my hips, pulling me back against him. He yanked me tank top off. I obediently raised my arms above my head as he took it off.

Oh gosh.

I had never been this exposed for Carson before.

_Fuck_.

I was _shaking_.

"Do you trust me?" he whispered in my ear.

I nodded my head slowly. "You know I do," I breathed.

"Then why are you shaking?"

I let out a quick, shaky sigh. "I've never done this before, Carson," I replied.

"Me either...but I've imagined it before."

My breath hitched as I felt him work with my bra clasp. Before the bra fall down my shoulders, my reflexes kicked in and my arms crossed over my chest, catching my bra as I kept it pressed to my breasts.

I felt him push my hair away from one part of my neck.

Carson knew me.

He knew how to control me.

He knew how to make me _melt_.

He kissed my neck and my eyes fluttered shut at the beautiful feeling of his lips on me as I felt his hands gently grab my wrists and pry them free. I weakly let him do that. He had let go of one of my wrists, the free hand pulling my bra off and away from me, throwing it off somewhere unknown.

My back arched as his kisses moved down my back until he reached my mid-back. I small whimper escaped when I felt myself get hot and heavy.

"The way you looked at me when I got out of the bathroom...the way you kiss..." I heard him murmur between kisses as he kissed his way back up to my neck. "Fuck, the way you whimper...the way you move..."

I let out a yelp when I felt him grab my breasts with both hands. My breath stopped as my heart hammered against my chest.

I was sitting on my knees. I knew that because my mind registered when I felt him pry my legs apart on the bed. A knee resting there where I sat. _Fuck_.

He kneaded my breasts, exploring my little by little as his hands left and then went down to undo my jeans. And just like that, his hand slipped inside. I yelped again when I felt his cold, trembling hands touch where no man had ever touched before. He slid his hand in until his palm was cupping my womanhood.

I felt the bed move as I soon felt his bare chest against my back, his free hand grabbing my chin and forcing it up and slightly twisting it around so that my lips could meet with his. My kiss was full of fault, but he didn't seem to mind. I was too focused on how his hand felt against my most private parts.

Suddenly, I realized I needed friction. My hips twitched, but I stopped, wondering if he liked that or not.

"That's right, Angel, I want to see you come undone over," he pecked my lips, "and over again."

I had never seen this side of Carson before.

_I liked it_.

I shivered, moaning when his hand moved.

And suddenly, I was being turned over by Carson. I whimpered at the loss of contact.

He grabbed my jeans and pulled them off of me with difficulty. I helped him.

And then he was crawling over me, laying me down as his mouth claimed mine, his tongue delving between my lips and twisting against mine.

_This is it_, I realized.

Yes, I was panicking.

But I trusted Carson. And I knew it was the time, it was right. I wanted him.

I was just panicking because I had never felt these..._feelings_ before. I guess a part of me was afraid he wouldn't like my appearance without the clothes, but he didn't seem displeased in any way, shape, or form.

He pinned me into the mattress, kissing me possessively and roughly, but passionately and lovingly. My hands boldly went up and wrapped around so that they grabbed at his bare back, feeling the smoothness of his milky white skin. He felt so good beneath my hands.

And then I felt it.

He was moving his hips, pressing his hardness between my thighs, rubbing against me there.

"_Fuck_," I blurted between our kissing in a stressed whisper.

He moaned as I wrapped my legs around his waist, feeling him more clearly grind into me.

Suddenly, he pulled back, his breath heavy and his hips slowing down shakily. Without warning, he grabbed my ankles, raising my legs as he took my panties off. I was now completely naked beneath my boyfriend.

In the darkness of the setting sunlight, I saw his eyes dance with passion as he looked down at my naked form.

I was so exposed to him that it scared me of what he was thinking.

"You're beautiful," he whispered.

His hand returned to my pussy that was surely wet. I sucked in a breath, moaning when I felt his finger brush against my sensitive pearl, his finger moving to my opening and slipping it inside. "Fuck you're wet," I heard him whisper as he slowly added a second finger. He was stretching me. "And tight..."

His fingers left me, a finger finding my pearl again and stroking it. "I read that most good orgasms are brought by rubbing this..." I heard him murmur.

_Holy fuck._

I felt an orgasm building up.

Yes, I had gotten off on my own before. I knew what happened. I wasn't a little kid. I was a Senior, a girl ready for the sexual part of the world.

Slowly, my hips began rocking against his finger.

Before I knew it, I was coming undone. My face crunched up and my mouth opened as a silent moan left me, my hips freezing.

"_Fuck_, you're hot when you come."

I whimpered as his hand left me and his lips had found me again. Still coming down from the orgasm, I felt him suddenly leave me. He had just hooked his hands into the waist of his pants when I stopped him.

"I want to," I told him shyly.

I had come before him, he had _made_ me come...surely there was nothing left to be bold about.

I slowly sat up. There Carson stood, on his knees, shirtless, and horny before me. I leaned forward, my lips colliding with the skin just below his belly button. I heard him take in a sharp breath. My fingers hooked into the elastic of the waist, pulling the fabric down until it was bunched up at the knees.

Carson retreated, getting to his feet as he stood before the bed, taking his pants completely off until he was now completely naked as well. He stood there, his face scarcely unreadable. Openly, my eyes traveled down the lengths of him, stopping at his manhood. He was larger than what I had expected. I wasn't sure whether to depict that as a good or bad thing.

He slowly crawled onto the bed, our eyes locked with one another until his lips pressed against mine. Slowly, he guided me down until I was laying on the bed once more.

He rested between my legs, his hands taking mine and pinning them to the mattress beside my head slowly.

I guess I should have seen what was coming up next. I should have recognized it in his eyes. But a scream left me when he thrusted into me. My breath stopped for a moment, my eyes closing at the sudden pain. I squeezed his hands.

He was kissing my cheek, my temple, my chin, my nose, my forehead, my lips, comforting me.

He had frozen his hips, his breath heavy in my ear as he continued to try and comfort me.

"It's okay baby, I love you, we fit together, this is how it should be, you feel wonderful, I love you," I had heard over and over as I focused on my breathing.

Slowly, carefully, he began to move his hips.

At first, it stung.

It stung like a bitch.

But then slowly, _slowly_, that stinging was replaced with pleasure.

Sweet, sweet, chaotic pleasure I had never felt before.

It was that type of pleasure that made your body writhe in ecstasy, moan...want more. "More," was exactly what I asked from him.

And he had increased the speed, rocking his hips as he filled me up completely almost every two seconds.

Yes, I counted.

I wanted to know how long it took for me to come a second time for him, _because _of him. And fuck, I was expecting it at any moment, but all it did was continue to build and build until...

"C-Carson...I...fuck...I'm..."

"That's right, baby. Come for me," he whispered against my lips. He had his forehead resting against mine, our breaths heavy and our lips inches apart as he pounded into me. He had let go of my hands, now grabbing my thighs and pushing them up until I was wide, spread open for him to cleanly pound into me, rubbing against my pleasure spot over and over...

I screamed his name as I came hard, my hands covering my mouth as I rode the waves of pleasure.

And just as I came, he pulled out of me, coming as well as I felt his hot seed spill onto my stomach.

That night, my boyfriend Carson took my virginity. And it was the happiest day of my life.

* * *

**A/N: **So, like, do you ever get that feeling like:

"_What if Chris Colfer reads this."_

"_What if Chris Colfer reads this and gets embarrassed."_

"_Or worse, annoyed."_

…

"_Pfft. WHO CARES. I'm never going to meet him anyways!"_


End file.
